Is it too early to award the “most ornate” medal? I know we just started, but it’s going to be difficult to find one that beats St. John the Baptist. It doesn’t dominate on pure size—it’s big, but not quite as big as some of the others we’ve seen, or are going to see. Instead, it just goes to town on the décor. It’s as if the designer gave his kid Pixie Sticks and let him have free reign. Now, yes, never mind the fact that Pixie Sticks didn’t exist in the mid-1800s. But that’s really the best explanation, since St. John the Baptist has ornamentation on top ornamentation. Brilliant (and big) stained glass, high-set statues overlooking the congregation, gilded pillars with intricate carvings, paintings ABOVE said pillars, with a variety of flags even ABOVE that, and just an incredible, amazing assortment of crazy, ridiculous and absolutely gorgeous stuff. There is not one plain or blank space in the whole church. On some levels you’d think it’d be nauseating, as only a sugar-induced fever could provide, but it somehow works beautifully, and more often than not leaves you speechless. Oh, and speaking of speechless, just take a look at the altar—it’s a huge marble monstrosity that defies words.
Oh, and to just add to everything, it also features a graveyard surrounded by a high, impregnable stone wall. You know the kind of graveyard I’m talking about—the creepy, impossibly old kind, with huge, sometimes grotesque and elaborate tombstones. Add some darkness and fog, and it could be something out of a nightmare. Afternoon sunlight doesn’t hold the same effect, though.
LOOK FOR IT: Unlike most churches, St. John the Baptist still uses real intention candles. No push buttons here! It's delightfully old school.
All in all, this is most remarkable. It’s too early to name a winner, but…
Size Rating: 9 out of 10
Ornamentation Rating: 10 out of 10
Overall Design Rating: 10 out of 10 crosses.
